Friday, 23 September 2011
Goodbye, Sweet Boys
Well, this is it, and I don't even know how to put it into words. This is my last night with my baby boys before they head off for their forever homes tomorrow.
I'm sorry that I haven't written in a while. I've been a bit down in the dumps for quite a few reasons, and just haven't been able to force myself to put pen to paper to write. Even if I had managed, I don't know how doom and gloom it would have bene, so thought it better to avoid the blog. I didn't realise how much time had passed in between when I'd last written and now, so apologies for that.
There isn't terribly much to report this week, or perhaps there is and I'm just not able to think of it because my mind is trying to say goodbye to these little boys before they leave tmorrow, and the easiest way for me to do that is to detatch from them... I doubt I'll succeed I'm afraid.
They're really enjoying sleeping in bed with me, and I'm hoping this is something the new owners will continue to allow them to do. Whenever I go to bed at night, little Millie is straight in there and up on my pillow for cuddles, and when I wake in the morning it's to find all three cuddled around my head and as happy as can be. Tia doesn't sleep by my face, so it's a rare treat that I'm really enjoying.
They had their last vaccinations just yesterday as the vet was fully booked when they should have gone on Tuesday, but as usual, they had no reaction to it other than sleeping a lot yesterday. They also had their microchips done. Poor Millie had to have hers done twice as the first one came out within about an hour of being put in there. Poor babies. They were wormed and had their claws clipped too, so they were really put through it. Millie also had her DNA test done, so I should know this time next week whether she's PKD negative or not, and whether she carries chocolate. Of course, I know she won't test positive for PKD as her parents are both negative, but I test just to be double sure.
I bought them some new toys this week. Some new, stronger cubes which they're absolutely mad about, and some other bits and pieces like small balls etc. Da Bird continues to be a massive hit in this house, and the kittens play until they drop or until my arm gets tired. It's usually the arm that gives up before the babies do though.
Ok, I can't make myself write too much more tonight. The pain of letting these babies go is immense, and the tears are just flooding from me the more I force myself to remember their last week. Their time with me is so short, and I don't even think I treasured it enough. I don't know how I could have loved them more, but when you know time is coming to an end, it just never seems enough, does it? I have to just keep reminding myself of the joy and excitement I had at bringing my first cat home, and how grateful I was that the breeder had made the sacrifice so that I could add a furry friend to my family. If I can do that for someone else, then I've done well. That only goes so far though.
The boys will both go to the same home which is just about the best I could hope for. They will go to friends of mine who are absolutely lovely people. Two little boys will most likely not get much sleep tonight as they lie awake thinking of the cats that will come to join them tomorrow. I couldn't have asked for a better home. But I'll probably not get much sleep tonight either thinking of the two little lives that will leave me for good tomorrow. I'll confess that I don't know how to deal with it propperly. In fact, I don't know how to deal with it at all.
I'm afraid that's all for now. Sorry to end on such a low note, but I just don't have it in me to be cheerful tonight. I hope this gets easier with tim,e but a tiny, very truthful part of me knows it probably won't.